REAL REVIEW

An entertaining movie, much like a good meal, is worth the price you pay. And even though a bad movie, unlike a bad meal, probably won’t give you the runs, paying $10 dollars to see it will make you feel like shit.

Disturbia

Production Budget: 20M

Worldwide Gross: 91.7M

(Movie Spoiler – if you wanna call it that with this movie.)

Since Disturbia came out in theaters, I wanted to see it. I actually planned on several occasions to go, but despite my better efforts, it just never happened (I guess I was actually busy or something; I know, shocking). When I finally did pick up a copy of the DVD yesterday at work, I waited all night until my shift was over so I could finally see what all the hype was about. After all, I had heard on numerous occasions that Disturbia was “good.” When I got home I wasted little time, throwing the DVD into my 360, eagerly anticipating thrills that, unfortunately – and even strangely – never came.

The main problem with Disturbia is its very basic, predictable story. Blaming himself for a car accident that killed his father, Kale’s (main character played by Shia Lebouf) life spirals downward, leading to trouble with the law. Sentenced to three-months house arrest for assault, Kale wastes the summer days away in his bedroom, staring at the ceiling. Unable to occupy his mind, he becomes a voyeur, spying on his hot new neighbor Ashely, but also on his apparently creepy, “must be a killer” neighbor Mr. Turner. It remains unclear why Kale pitted Mr. Turner as your typical serial killer though, as he exhibits little in the way of odd behavior at first. Perhaps he was mowing his lawn too often? Oh wait, he’s roughly 6’2″, about 220 pounds with slick grey hair; therefore, he’s a killer by default? Right, of course, it makes sense now…

Despite his voyeuristic tendencies, Ashley eventually befriends Kale, leading to a romantic relationship; apparently Ashley is an exhibitionist, so it works out well. When Kale confides in Ashley that he thinks Mr. Turner is the Texas serial killer, she playfully denies his accusations, and then, with little reason or resistance, agrees to spy on Mr. Turner. She follows him around, watching his every move, apparently building up a case against him, when all of a sudden he appears out of nowhere and warns Ashley to back off. But, like the children they are, Kale and Ashley don’t stop spying, they only get deeper into a mess that is utterly and completely predictable. Obvious from the outset, Mr. Turner ends up being the elusive (from FBI), but unelusive (from voyeur boy) serial killer; Kale gets the credit for figuring it out, and as a reward, has his house arrest sentence terminated. What a hero, the world truly needs more Kale in it – no, not the green leaf used for garnish – the hero boy. What was Mrs. Turner thinking when she named her son anyway? “He looks green and wet, lets name him Kale Face.” I digress.

To be honest, Disturbia is not a horrible movie – its just not particularly good either. In retrospect, I believe Disturbia to be a casualty of my unrealistic expectations. I heard so much coming into this movie, and was thus disappointed to find that for the most part it delivered little. Except for one scene, the movie lacked any measurable level of suspense or fear. Right from the beginning you knew who was good, who was bad, and who would win. Still, minus what I believe to be a very basic, nauseatingly predictable plot, the acting was pretty good. As I’ve said before, and will continue to say now, Shia Lebouf is a fine young actor with a great career ahead of him. Moreover, the cast surrounding him was solid. Carrie Ann Moss (The Matrix series) was fine, albeit limited by her role, and David Morse (Green Mile) was ok.

In closing, what you get out of Disturbia is a decent, albeit predictable teenage movie that will keep your attention, but ultimately, fade into obscurity with the rest…

~Josh

For the best bang for your buck: Pick it up as a new release DVD if there is nothing else to get – the movie will at least keep your attention. However, if something better is in (i.e 300, Transformers, Bourne Ultimatum), grab that instead of this movie.

How do you rate this movie?
1) Worth seeing in the Theatre
2) Worth a new release rental
3) Worth a bargain bin rental
4) Worth an illegal download
5) Worth watching through your neighbor’s windowView ResultsMake your own poll
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1 Comment»

  jcanti71 wrote @

“What a hero, the world truly needs more Kale in it – no, not the green leaf used for garnish – the hero boy.”

Funny shit.


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